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I know exactly when the Strait of Hormuz will re-open and the war in Iran will end.
No, I haven’t got a crystal ball. No, I haven’t time traveled to the future and come back. All it takes, in this case and in so many others involving King Trump, is an absolute sense of cynicism and a realization that all things in this Great-Again nation are possible and that they are arranged exclusively for the benefit of one man.
Question: When will this war be over?
Answer: Just in time for the midterm elections. Just in time for voters to be told that Guess-Who has made the price of gasoline and groceries come down. Just in time to tell every voter with an IQ of 80 or less—and, unfortunately, the votes of morons count as much as those of Nobel Prize winners—that Trump has WON the war, that all things are already getting BETTER under the tutelage of His Brilliance.
How can you deny the logic and vote for change. After all, isn’t the statement factually correct? Last week gas was seven bucks a gallon and you were feeling terrible. Now it’s way down to six, so cheer up and get out and vote Republican. And, by the way, forget the fact that Guess-Who is the only reason that gas was so high in the first place.
Oh, and we did win the war and accomplish our goals. Just think of it, the old Ayatollah is gone–even if his son, the new leader, is more hard-line than his dad. We obliterated their nuclear capacity—well, sort of and maybe, and well, who knows—but we did. And it only cost us several billions of dollars and barely a few soldiers’ lives.
Thinking more broadly, you’ve got to tip your hat to the behind-the-scenes people running the government, the smart, despicable, and vicious people who are whispering in Trump’s ear and telling him what to do and when to do it. These people know how to make him money, how to evade every limit on the presidency, and how to get revenge on every person who has ever dared to oppose him. In the first Trump term the people around him, shrewd but also with some sense of the law and its limits, said: But Mr. President, that’s not legal–or that won’t fly–or they’ll never let you get away with that. Now they tell him that anything goes. You can go to war without even letting the Congress in on your plans. You can create a slush fund to reimburse those terribly mistreated Proud Boys who stormed the Capitol in your name. You can get rid of every lawmaker who ever voted against you without even slipping anything in their morning coffee.
Ooooops. I just realized that I was probably wrong about the timing of the end of the war and its effects on the midterms. Now that I think of it more closely, how could I have been so silly. So foolish. So naïve. There will be no midterms. Trump will declare that holding midterms is not practical in the midst of our entanglement in Iran, during our takeover of Cuba, and don’t forget, of course, our annexation of Greenland.
So I’ve got to re-program my crystal ball. Anything is possible for the Great Leader, no matter how it destroys the fabric of what is supposed to be a democracy. And if you didn’t think that the sky’s the limit in Trump’s second term, just wait to see what he’s got in store for his third term.
I think this is sadly and unfortunately very likely. (Although I think that in one way or another the midterm elections will still take place.) Can we assure somehow that the Iranian leadership reads it?