Veep de Trump - Kru's Control

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“So I have thought very very long about who should be my Vice President, and I have considered many many candidates. I knew that my Vice President has to be very very smart and very very prepared, and I know that that sucker has to be very very experienced and very very thoughtful. And I want you all to know that there were many many good candidates.

“I considered Kristi Noem because she is very very compassionate and very very brave. After all, how many chicks would have the nerve not only to shoot the family dog but to tell the whole world about it.

“I considered Marco Rubio because he has very very little backbone. Imagine little old Marco ever taking a principled stand and refusing to do my bidding like Mike Pence did. We need people who are trustworthy and loyal, and Marco could have been my version of Kristi’s dog.

“And you remember Katie Britt, that cool chick from Alabama. She might have made a good VP, but she looked so terrific in her kitchen that I’d rather have her as Secretary of the Interior.”

“I love the limelight, you know, so Glenn Youngkin and Doug Burgum would have been very very good VPs. I don’t know the two jokers and hardly anyone else does even though they are governors of some shit-hole states. But with these nobodies I’d never ever have to worry about them hogging the stage.

“And then there is Tim Scott. I’m not sure what I know about him, but I do know that he is very very black. Now, you guys know that I am color blind, but I think it might be nice to have a guy of his political complexion on my ticket.

“And you guys probably remember Ben Carson. He was a brain surgeon and of the same political complexion. We repaid his loyalty back in 2016, putting him as sort of a joke, you know, as Secretary of Housing and Urban Development. So if he could fake it in the cabinet doing something he knew nothing about, I figure he could also fake it as Veep.

“I considered that wild guy Vivek Ramaswamy, but he’s weird, and, anyway, I’d like to run with an American rather than some foreigner.

“And of course, there is Majorie Taylor Greene. My oh my, she would have liked to be my VP very very very much. Still, in comparison to her that Ramaswany guy seems sane, so even I have limits when it comes to people who have some contact with reality.

“But I’ve made my decision, so drum roll please.

“After very very lengthy consideration, I have come up with the ideal Vice President for my second, and possibly even my third and fourth term. Ladies and gentlemen, I have found the best man for the job and it is….

“Don Jr! A handsome fellow. A loyal follower. A chip off the old block.

“It’s a very very wise choice because it is part of a very very great plan. After me, Don Jr can become President and appoint Eric as his VP who then would become President, and, you know, so on and so on. It works in England and it can work here too.